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se-cu-ri-ty

se-cu-ri-ty

I am still pondering and rambling about the issues of one’s Happiness Index. I tried to understand the variables and factors that can make us happy and I strongly believe in the formulae that

Happy = combination {love, health, wealth, time, passion and more…..}.

Recently, I realized that for some people, the factor SECURITY can be added to the equation. I began pondering what is “Security” or “sense of feeling secured”. Is it money terms ? Is it protection, guarantee, or perhaps simply “a sense of hope” ?

And when someone suggested that “Woman marries for security reasons”, the statement bugs me and to a certain extend, annoys me. Why does  one marry another for security ?

Is there a trade off ? To receive some, one must give some, sooner or later. Even winning a lottery or jackpot requires time and some money to purchase or play the game. And off course, lots of luck at the right time, right place. Ans sometimes – easy get, easy go !

se·cu·ri·ty (some definition)

  • The state of being free from danger or threat.
  • Emotional security – safe, stable, and free from fear or anxiety
  • Defense against financial failure
  • Degree of protection against danger, damage, loss, and criminal activity.
  • Form of protection

So, when one marry another, giving up freedom of time & decision making, love for someone (love yourself or others) for another, sometimes money and perhaps one’s sanity, comfort and personal space – does that person feel more secured after the marriage ? Or feel more vulnerable now that there are new sets of situations, rules, way of doing things and persons to consider ?

What about time – does one need more security over time ? Or does it reduce over time ? Can we actually capture and quantify how much security one needs ? factors change over time, does security change too ?

Marriage is not the purchase of insurance plans or takaful plans, which insures and almost guarantee against financial losses stipulated upfront.

I urge woman who marry for security (monetary) reasons to purchase insurance or takaful plans, NOT purchase husbands if they want financial security ! Coverage encompass – medical (hospitalization & critical illness), life (buy term), personal accident, traveling, loss of income and more. Also make sure you have reliable alarm system, cctv, grills and the like placed at homes. Do regular backups of computer, laptops, handphones and electronic gadgets. Do regular excercise, eat healthy food, sleep 8 hours daily and no, no, no smoking (or second-hand smoking) or take alcoholic drinks (or be with someone who drinks and doesn’t know how much drinks they can handle and then drives you home) !

I urge woman who lead a professional life and are able to manage their finances well, if not better than their other half, to SECURE themselves with investment plans. Call me for investment plans tailored for woman needs – retirement, security during old-age, traveling or holidays, pilgrimage (haj & umrah) and purchase of assets. Let’s talk money, and be empowered by how secured you can be and feel. Be smart and wise.

There are things than we can plan and strategize. As the saying goes – only death and taxes are certain.

So SECURITY is a feeling – the feeling of having enough or more. The feeling if something bad happens, then there’s backup. The feeling that one does not feel threatened financially, physically and mentally. Can we have all three ingredients of security ? A woman marrying a rich man, has insecurities and may feel mentally and financially threatened if the husband is a womaniser. A man married to a beautiful woman, may feel mentally threatened and “physically challenged”. A woman with a good husband may feel financially threatened if the good husband ventures into risky business or takes up risky sports. A wealthy person may feel physically threatened when faced with critical and chronic diseases. A beautiful and young woman may feel her mental security (her sanity) may reduce over time, waking up every morning to an old but filthy rich husband. Hell ! There’s no security but we just hope and pray things will be ok. And in order to have that “sense of security” one must first learn “to trust”. Give your trust and you may receive that “sense of hope” that things will work out fine.

My point is security cannot be bought as there are millions of possibilities and outcome from our every decision in life. Countries and nations spent billions to feel secured. But are they ? Go google a certain country called Costa Rica who don’t even have an army and believe in education and human well-being as the best form of security and natural defense. So, we must learn, we must just have faith after executing our plans and listening to both our head and heart. Having faith that the outcome (hopefully) is in our favor. This is qadha and qadar where every action has a fated outcome.

Everyone deserves to be happy. So everyone must plan and strategize their life to lead a happy life. And happiness is just not here but also hereafter. Many a time we focus to much on “here” but plan less for the “hereafter” which is more eternal (I too need reminders every now and then). Too often we focus on material happiness here at the expense of happiness hereafter. We forget our “being here” is temporary and that all that we have here are lent and entrusted to us, to be used wisely and meaningfully here. But we shall someday be made to answer in the hereafter, how wisely or meaningfully did we utilize these resources during our lifetime. How are we to answer ?

Ponder my friends…

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